The "Carnivalization" of Cunard

For those of you who do not know, Cunard is owned by Carnival, also owners of Carnival, Princess, P&O and God only knows what else.

And the Queen Mary 2 standards are falling, stupidly, in ways that are immediately apparent.

The pillow chocolates are about half the size of the ones previously left on the bed at night.  The “downsize” served as fodder for the comedians in the variety shows as well as for the (many) complaining passengers.

The shower caps given to the passengers are almost too small for adults.

The midnight buffet, which used to be open until 4 am when continental breakfast begins, suddenly, last month, closed at 1 am.  A group of us left the disco early and headed upstairs for a light snack of ……..spare ribs, only to find the buffet closed. It is now open until 2 and after that…room service which can take up to 45 minutes, as we are always warned.

World Voyages on QM2 used to be sold in long segments but then Carnival realized it could rake in much more by selling short segments – 8 days, anyone can afford that.  Just fill the ship, no matter what.

So, now the ship is often filled with uncouth louts of both sexes who have no idea of “dressing for dinner” on formal evenings and wander around in jeans, ragged shorts and shirts too small to accommodate the beer belly underneath – the dress code is only enforced in the dining room but the rest of the ship is a free-fire zone.

My last neighbors screamed obscenities along the hallways as a matter of course.  But, from Carnival’s point of view, they are fine.  The casino is busy, busy, busy and the earnings from the bar rise exponentially.

Last month, at high tea no less, a man at the table next to me picked up a fruit tart (small pastry cup with custard and glazed fruit) which crumbled in his hand.  He stuffed the pieces in his mouth and then licked his palm clean.  Reminded me of my dogs.

For me, the saddest aspect of the decline is the deterioration of the entertainment staff.  These are the “first line of defense” for Cunard and with the exception of the cruise directors, the social hostess, Janet, and 2 others, they are absolutely horrible, in appearance and distressing lack of education as well as general ignorance about manners and decorum.

From the way some of the entertainment staff speak to the passengers, you might be confused about who works here.

We are daily berated in line dancing – “What’s wrong with you? Are you all tired today”  “You don’t seem very lively”.  “Why aren’t you smiling?”  The previous trainer was even worse – she didn’t bother to learn the dances and tried to teach us reading the steps.  It got so bad that one of the passengers took over the class and fortunately did an excellent job. Nevertheless, she insulted us by saying that line dancing was only provided so that we (passengers) would have some way to pass the time.

I have been asked by many passengers to teach it but this is my holiday.

While they might be suitable for a Carnival ship (although I doubt even that), if they were on land, the only jobs they could get would be the ones asking, “You want fries with that?”

I cannot think of another luxury brand which has cheapened itself and survived.  And, it is all so unnecessary.  Leave or raise the Cunard standards and let the Carnival ships have the lager louts

Does anyone reading this know Sir Richard Branson?  He should put together a consortium and buy Cunard and rescue it from further “carnivalization”.

Ok, that’s enough whining/whinging about this tiny little first-world problem.  My voyage of discovery continues to be amazing.

But, I meant what I said about Sir Richard.